Presented by / 6/27/2014 / 1 Comment / , , ,

MARK WAHLBERG IN TRANSFORMERS: AGE OF EXTINCTION

year: 2014 rating: **
In BOOGIE NIGHTS, Mark Wahlberg sings a wonderfully cheesy song titled You Got The Touch, which originated from the 1986 animated TRANSFORMERS MOVIE…

This is the type of useless pop culture trivia going through the mind of a film freak while watching a reboot of a reboot that piles on everything to make a big budget movie shine, but misses the mark entirely…

Not Mark Wahlberg, who has far more screen time than any of the Transformers put together. Although the entire plot centers on the friendly robots that, in the last movie, defended mankind from immense metal plated goons attacking Chicago...

And now it's all about the humans either protecting or destroying the invaders... Especially Wahlberg’s quirky and bankrupt wannabe Texas inventor Cade Yeager, living in a dilapidated farm with a mature looking teenage daughter who could easily pass as a girlfriend. The overly protected Tessa is so beloved and cherished she’s bound to get kidnapped… And while Cade's gadget-tinkering hobby is intriguing at first, his resilient tech skills don't amount to much when the ball gets rolling...

Not enough Optimus time
But that’s skipping ahead. First we must weather a tacked-on, forced comic relief from T.J. Miller’s surfer dude Lucas, and then Stanley Tucci as an equally jokey and sarcastic scientist named Joshua Joyce, who's a lot more important being that he invented an entirely new consumer-friendly Transformer that can alter itself by (what looks like) flying molecules rather than the usual noisy shape-shifting. Also on board is Kelsey Grammer as a nefarious CIA agent who wants all Transformers obliterated by using Joyce's invention, or something.

The titular heroes do have a decent amount of screen time, holed up in the desert and goading back and forth like seasoned war buddies during a Saturday night poker match... Yet they seem like special guest stars in someone else’s movie…

Shifting from America to Japan – where a host of metallic dinosaurs join the fight against a giant spaceship – all the Transformers do is follow Cade as he attempts to rescue his daughter and before that, having been joined by her young racy boyfriend, the trio’s chemistry is so reminiscent of ARMAGEDDON you’ll expect Wahlberg to become Bruce Willis while an Aerosmith ballad plays: But no matter who the heroic human is, and while it’s nice not having Shia LaBeouf around, those Transformers needed more creative reasons to awesomely morph into earthy vessels (what the source toy franchise was all about)... And during the last of several overlong climaxes, when Prime and his immense foe are about to square off, Wahlberg rushes into the scene for assistance, not realizing that an uninterrupted metal vs metal smackdown is long overdue.
Share This Post :
Tags : , , ,

1 comment:

  1. Great review...The other reviews also have been mostly critical...sloppy story one, dull characters, unbelievable situations, etc...that I think I'll pass. Thanks, James, for the usual astute overview and perfect detail...Kudos. Gar

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

All Time Popular

WWW.CULTFILMFREAKS.COM

WWW.CULTFILMFREAKS.COM
Movie Reviews, Interviews & Pop Culture ranging from White Heat to Blade Runner

NOW PLAYING IN THEATERS

NOW PLAYING IN THEATERS
Includes Current Streaming Rental Flicks

FOR TELEVISION REVIEWS

FOR TELEVISION REVIEWS
From Movies of the Week to Cable Serials

LIKE US ON FACEBOOK

TOTAL HITS

Popular Trending

FOUNDED BY JAMES M. TATE

FOUNDED BY JAMES M. TATE
cultfilmfreak@jamesmtate.com

WEBSITE INFORMATION

WEBSITE INFORMATION
Random Quote: "I'll tell you about the Force as a career, and you can tell me about the town where nobody paints." Robert Dix to Merry Anders, Air Patrol

Blog Archive

ETERNAL ART OF FILM NOIR

RARE & EXPLOITATION CINEMA

THE SHORTLIST

FAVORITE MOTION PICTURES
1)THE MAN FROM LARAMIE 2)JAWS 3)THE CROWDED SKY 4)THE FEARMAKERS 5)HARDCORE 6)ANATOMY OF A MURDER 7)JOURNEY INTO FEAR 8)HOT CARS 9)VIOLENT SATURDAY 10)RAIDERS FROM BENEATH THE SEA

SEVEN FAV ACTORS & DIRECTORS
1)DANA ANDREWS 2)JAMES CAGNEY 3)MARLON BRANDO 4)JACK NICHOLSON 5)TOM COURTENAY
6)PETER O'TOOLE 7)CHARLES BRONSON
1)RICHARD FLEISCHER 2)JACQUES TOURNEAR 3)STANLEY KUBRICK 4)ORSON WELLES 5)OTTO PREMINGER 6)STEVEN SPIELBERG 7)JOHN LANDIS

Popular This Month

OUR OWN CORNERSTONE

OUR OWN CORNERSTONE
Take a Wild Swing at Dana Andrews Cinema

Blogs of Interest

SOARING TO THE SEVENTIES

SOARING TO THE SEVENTIES
Chinatown to High Rolling to Corvette Summer

RETURN TO THE HOMEPAGE