GROUCHY MALE REVIEW OF MAGIC MIKE XXL

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBckfvii9FREOkxyf7LrHk8MAWynx8-GFHczw9HvW9WMJtizlqzVkbKDus8TSQEW364uKf0WFeFM7aNcyNtZb1DW0hzoF19DoAUKAZwg3k1vqWW3X6pRsJ-A6-m2zbH7OV8UlrtGMajK0/s1600/mmxx.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBckfvii9FREOkxyf7LrHk8MAWynx8-GFHczw9HvW9WMJtizlqzVkbKDus8TSQEW364uKf0WFeFM7aNcyNtZb1DW0hzoF19DoAUKAZwg3k1vqWW3X6pRsJ-A6-m2zbH7OV8UlrtGMajK0/s320/mmxx.png" width="167" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">2015 rating: *</td></tr> </tbody></table> Thank kitschy heaven for Joe Manganiello: The giant actor (who could have been the next Tony "Meat" Ganios if PORKY'S was remade), playing Big Dick Richie, is the best thing going for this limp MAGIC MIKE sequel, in which the only thing XXL is our airhead comic relief's stage name...<br /> <br /> And so now, instead of a Steven Soderbergh art film only partially centering on the kind of male revue that secretaries file in droves to catch on the big screen, especially with former stripper turned cinema dancer turned A-list Hollywood leading man Channing Tatum at the helm, we now have a bonafide road trip movie that's even more ponderous and, trying desperately to be artistic with askew insert shots, overlong conversations with a new disassociated love interest and added-on characters who act as if they've been around all along... like Mike's former boss Jada Pinkett Smith as a madame MC... the core fans wanting what men got with SHOWGIRLS are once again subjected (whether they know it or not) to Tatum's pretentious agenda to make his former trade, in which he's much too talented and professional to seem realistic, more ponderously deep than gloriously banal. 

2015, channing tatum, dance

GROUCHY MALE REVIEW OF MAGIC MIKE XXL

2015 rating: * Thank kitschy heaven for Joe Manganiello: The giant actor (who could have been the next Tony "Meat" Ganios if P...

CHANNING TATUM & MILA KUNIS IN JUPITER ASCENDING

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaVrARufyK965mVVYx8qAziuHHt8diuhuGoxmL_nHlkJU-Phczunji6jnllmHfIcD0z-KbTWJ4C8x4d1AReINMC4rcG1ID4n5fjnI6OJdFoNu3DVHFVdMelDkUKb_qaed-1lK0Q6J7Uyk/s1600/Screen+shot+2015-02-05+at+11.02.54+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaVrARufyK965mVVYx8qAziuHHt8diuhuGoxmL_nHlkJU-Phczunji6jnllmHfIcD0z-KbTWJ4C8x4d1AReINMC4rcG1ID4n5fjnI6OJdFoNu3DVHFVdMelDkUKb_qaed-1lK0Q6J7Uyk/s320/Screen+shot+2015-02-05+at+11.02.54+PM.png" width="182" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">2015 rating: **</td></tr> </tbody></table> The Wachowskis deserve credit for, like their first MATRIX, coming up with a pulpy yarn not based on an established franchise or comic book or a teenager’s favorite dystopian-future novel… And with a super-heroine name like Jupiter Jones, it’s surprising that Mila Kunis’ character has such a mundane life, cleaning toilets and desperate enough to sell her eggs (yes, <i>those</i> eggs) for an eBay telescope: Something inside must yearn for the stars and, as they say, be careful what you wish for…<br /> <br /> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLelaEDJEBdWMPqYKywv9fsx4SwMHQoWXhvi5dpjQk0r_DkJ5Bvw22G87uwa8c8iAszbGSXwrfBwefvYNDoOORqoaiWIN5qbHS798RTGqjHu1WvHIU1jsMgR2ej8ckSj7JPy6M1qTI41o/s1600/1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLelaEDJEBdWMPqYKywv9fsx4SwMHQoWXhvi5dpjQk0r_DkJ5Bvw22G87uwa8c8iAszbGSXwrfBwefvYNDoOORqoaiWIN5qbHS798RTGqjHu1WvHIU1jsMgR2ej8ckSj7JPy6M1qTI41o/s200/1.png" width="93" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Tatum</td></tr> </tbody></table> But when it includes a dashing, handsome, solidly built half-wolf with Vulcan ears and roller-skate thrusters instead of shoes, perhaps that price isn’t so bad. Soon enough she’s blindly smitten by his looks alone, deleting any reluctance and awe for being catapulted into this extremely bizarre circumstance. <br /> <br /> In the resilient protector role is Channing Tatum. His Caine Wise is a cross between Clint Eastwood’s Spaghetti Western loner and Superman, which makes Jupiter an ideal Lois Lane. They even fly around together when he’s not getting her out of close calls: Which is all JUPITER ASCENDING amounts to: With a barrage of rambling exposition explaining the complicated star world run by an interstellar royal family pulling Jupiter... who happens to be their Queen... like a political wishbone, the action scenes are what you'll remember in this potentially epic science-fantasy that winds up merely filling time and space.

2015, channing tatum, mila kunis, science-fiction, sean bean

CHANNING TATUM & MILA KUNIS IN JUPITER ASCENDING

2015 rating: ** The Wachowskis deserve credit for, like their first MATRIX, coming up with a pulpy yarn not based on an established fran...

STEVE CARELL & CHANNING TATUM WRESTLE AGAINST TYPE IN FOXCATCHER

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4JN0XZRVGrx2d25ETrA4kFq98_Nf1T4ClvRtTkZtLatIJWVJMKG1LGu5bj7A5B0z7_DWuOoLMpZKFcB1GxK_COyJol-pymsJHdCbsXaVvQC0J_1JgeEAB9ir0u8D_KFXIClJeXQl__8E/s1600/1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4JN0XZRVGrx2d25ETrA4kFq98_Nf1T4ClvRtTkZtLatIJWVJMKG1LGu5bj7A5B0z7_DWuOoLMpZKFcB1GxK_COyJol-pymsJHdCbsXaVvQC0J_1JgeEAB9ir0u8D_KFXIClJeXQl__8E/s320/1.jpg" width="220" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">year: 2014 rating: **</td></tr> </tbody></table> If uncomfortable silence merited how good a film is, then FOXCATCHER… based on philanthropist Jon du Pont and Olympic Wrestling Gold Medalist brothers Mark and David Schultz… would be superior to THE GODFATHER and CITIZEN KANE, combined… <br /> <br /> But too much prolonged awkward silence, backed by a melancholy piano score, leaves a lot to be desired: especially with such an intriguing true crime origin. <br /> <br /> In the co-lead role is Steve Carell who, with a distracting prosthetic nose and a few extra pounds, portrays Jon du Pont with such anti-social behavior it’s difficult to spot an actual human being. Much of the film is a morbid seduction between the reclusive "coach" and Channing Tatum’s Mark Schultz. Du Pont takes in the lonely wrestler for his Foxcatcher team, living on the grounds of his plush, historic estate while training for the upcoming 1988 Seoul Olympics. Besides wrestling they travel and… snort cocaine. And while polar opposites physically, the odd couple has something in common…<br /> <br /> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT_L68pl_veCbdYAXc1lxUtaaMTe0e7aP-gWVzx47066BIpIM3VJzdkisBoMQCraCQZlb7AnjO8rvo2Y-x0C5C86m7r0Rof3vUrf6hAtFx_dM2rnvJnZzdGzCqt8dM0CtHl_jrR2FHZg4/s1600/foxcatcher-poster.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT_L68pl_veCbdYAXc1lxUtaaMTe0e7aP-gWVzx47066BIpIM3VJzdkisBoMQCraCQZlb7AnjO8rvo2Y-x0C5C86m7r0Rof3vUrf6hAtFx_dM2rnvJnZzdGzCqt8dM0CtHl_jrR2FHZg4/s200/foxcatcher-poster.jpg" width="162" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Poster Art</td></tr> </tbody></table> While du Pont can’t please his mother, Mark, with a perpetual chip on his shoulder, lives under the shadow of his more talented brother. And Channing Tatum proves that Carell’s not the only actor playing eerie to the hilt…<br /> <br /> <div style="text-align: left;"> </div> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPl7BLwx-4B5kE6B779zcvIR71XY_OiFLabnMCQLioLdgOGgkCCKjzwnOwMWbUrZQN-w08neAEBeQ2eS2s1i0rXaAgkuiddzJEdnGjB9f068Y8FeTNxoGP6kz6Gn51wV2OAN6VK6LgvQQ/s1600/CTFoxCannes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPl7BLwx-4B5kE6B779zcvIR71XY_OiFLabnMCQLioLdgOGgkCCKjzwnOwMWbUrZQN-w08neAEBeQ2eS2s1i0rXaAgkuiddzJEdnGjB9f068Y8FeTNxoGP6kz6Gn51wV2OAN6VK6LgvQQ/s320/CTFoxCannes.jpg" width="181" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Channing Tatum</td></tr> </tbody></table> In many ways, Tatum's performance is equally bizarre and uncomfortable. With the cadence of a hunkered ape and the personality of an ice block, the mainstream superstar definitely vanishes into this unique indie role. Unfortunately, the film never provides the right amount of tension to stretch beyond dazed reactions to both coaches controlling his psyche: the millionaire and the older brother...<br /> <br /> Enter Mark Ruffalo’s doomed David Schultz, the most interesting performer on board – finally, someone with an actual pulse! He loves his wife, plays with his children, listens to The Grateful Dead during picnics, and becomes suspicious of what the audience already knows. And yet, within the story, he remains peripheral to his brother's downward spiral, supposedly caused by du Pont's creepy mentoring...<br /> <br /> Thus, in a film promoted as a coach obsessed with an athlete, given the tragic turnout we were obviously centered on the wrong pair.  

2014, bio, channing tatum, mark ruffalo, sport, steve carell

STEVE CARELL & CHANNING TATUM WRESTLE AGAINST TYPE IN FOXCATCHER

year: 2014 rating: ** If uncomfortable silence merited how good a film is, then FOXCATCHER… based on philanthropist Jon du Pont and Olym...

THE BEST OF ME & THE BOOK OF LIFE

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcB5OvRxt62D0dyVHduJDwyyzWHehyphenhyphenTdg3ktwovuSnlCJVRBrN199dilJaZ8-ab8Qhp3_Rujp0Mvdsv1gwPPZtB4NwZt341DG8iMx4E8d1wwmFPuNEjMPMjS2eSd2vyaGafx9kIjonND0/s1600/1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcB5OvRxt62D0dyVHduJDwyyzWHehyphenhyphenTdg3ktwovuSnlCJVRBrN199dilJaZ8-ab8Qhp3_Rujp0Mvdsv1gwPPZtB4NwZt341DG8iMx4E8d1wwmFPuNEjMPMjS2eSd2vyaGafx9kIjonND0/s1600/1.jpg" width="201" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">year: 2014 rating: *</td></tr> </tbody></table> <b>THE BEST OF ME:</b> In a chick flick, it's no surprise when the good rich girl falls for the bad boy... only this boy isn’t bad but he's poor – and dull as a box of hammers…<br /> <br /> That’s the backstory, which jumps to and from what seems to be the mainline: of two melancholy grownups, with different lives, both inheriting the same house.<br /> <br /> As teenagers, Dawson and Amanda are in a relationship that’s much too easy. For her, it's the epitome of love at first site, and she won’t give in until he gives in, and then they’re a couple. That’s pretty much that. <br /> <br /> The problems are ignited by Dawson’s father, a white trash hillbilly who looks more like a scruffy English professor with a hangover. He beats his kid, making Dawson not only scarred but homeless... eventually living with a gentle WWII vet (Gerald McRaney) who recently lost his wife. <br /> <br /> The grownup Amanda and Dawson are played by Michelle Monaghan and James Marsden, both otherwise talented actors. The biggest problem (in a movie loaded with problems) is that the teenage version of Dawson looks absolutely nothing like Marsden – the flashbacks seem like completely different stories, and it’s tough to decipher which is worse than the other. Let’s call it a tie. <br /> <br /> Based on a book written by the film’s producer, Nicolas Sparks, THE BEST OF ME is the very worst of romantic kitsch. The chemistry is awkward and forced in the past... boring and pointless in the present... while the future provides a “twist” ending that should even make THE NOTEBOOK fanatics cringe. <br /> <br /> <table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbOwXFi117LvjfkomI29dtd093_29s3XIW36jSOoSgrd5cdk2kVD0G9bEptPP5tfYQQscU7M14GaD_UXRBx_ENea0J1mr-xaYED8mT2X8Legiu15jvGC9AFLauFKOtnNCi4ASFeE8JX7w/s1600/2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbOwXFi117LvjfkomI29dtd093_29s3XIW36jSOoSgrd5cdk2kVD0G9bEptPP5tfYQQscU7M14GaD_UXRBx_ENea0J1mr-xaYED8mT2X8Legiu15jvGC9AFLauFKOtnNCi4ASFeE8JX7w/s320/2.jpg" width="211" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">year: 2014 rating: ***</td></tr> </tbody></table> <b>THE BOOK OF LIFE:</b> In most stories, when you die and go to that place below, it’s not so good. But in BOOK OF LIFE, death rules… It’s a colorful underworld carnival where happiness is everywhere. People are dancing and having one… um… hell of a time.<br /> <br /> We eventually journey to this place with our hero Manolo, a bull fighter nice enough to spare the bull. He’s in love with childhood friend Maria, who has returned from abroad – and he’s not the only one smitten. Their mutual friend Joaquin, voiced by Channing Tatum, is a decorated soldier who desperately wants… well that’s for the viewer to find out.<br /> <br /> The spoiler isn’t that Manolo dies since the main plot involves the journey to find his true love, whom he thinks is also deceased. Much of the adventure, after the first twenty minutes loaded with an overkill of confusing exposition and distracting pop tunes, involves the vivid land reminiscent of WHAT DREAMS MAY COME only with an aeasetic combination of CGI, stop motion and surreal paper cutouts.  <br /> <br /> Guillermo Del Toro, in the Tim Burton fashion, produced this quirky kid's flick with heart and soul and enough eye-candy for a lifetime… and then some.

2014, adventure, animated, channing tatum, chick flick, james marsden, kids, michelle monaghan, romance

THE BEST OF ME & THE BOOK OF LIFE

year: 2014 rating: * THE BEST OF ME: In a chick flick, it's no surprise when the good rich girl falls for the bad boy... only this ...

CHANNING TATUM & JONAH HILL IN 22 JUMP STREET

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmknCh-ON8vmXgbq-bdb0xXRHD6SO03bulZI7J7x1z0-1BPaMBxaQwO99xjt39jIwiUbwyPaT5W9kLKdBpxTXQVcxOcQ2sOm7Wd2jOdyyApsBIshx0uhdYGs5o4RvnH8f2Js6BINy3Mf0/s1600/22_jump_street_movie_poster_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmknCh-ON8vmXgbq-bdb0xXRHD6SO03bulZI7J7x1z0-1BPaMBxaQwO99xjt39jIwiUbwyPaT5W9kLKdBpxTXQVcxOcQ2sOm7Wd2jOdyyApsBIshx0uhdYGs5o4RvnH8f2Js6BINy3Mf0/s1600/22_jump_street_movie_poster_1.jpg" width="215" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">year: 2014 rating: **</td></tr> </tbody></table> Loaded with potential, 22 JUMP STREET is the sequel to the comedic buddy teamup (based on the 1980’s Johnny Depp TV show) where Christopher Tatum and Jonah Hill posed as high schoolers to bust a drug dealer…<br /> <br /> Not only did it score at the box office, 21 JUMP STREET was actually really funny and involving, and the duo made a fantastic polar opposite team.<br /> <br /> The first of many inside-jokes is when Ice Cube’s grouchy Captain of the 22 Jump Street’s new abandoned church location comments on how no one thought the first “reboot” (referring to the church within the movie, but not really) would actually work like it did... And now they’re piling more money into this new one (again quasi-referring to the church)… Something sequels actually have to do to win over audiences, a second time. <br /> <br /> The intentionally mirrored storyline of Hill’s Schmidt and Tatum’s Jenko in college lacks the suspenseful undercover element of keeping their identities secret: Not only do they constantly shrug off the mission at hand… finding the drug dealer that sold to a girl who fatally overdosed… but the students they're involved with are equally pointless and unmotivated. <br /> <br /> Jenko bonds with a fellow football jock while Schmidt scores (much too easily) with a girl way out of his league. The twist on who that girl’s related to provides some laughter but the joke gets old after a while. As do the bromantic metrosexual comparisons about the bickering cop-partners being in and out of a close relationship... You’re straight but seem otherwise: We get it already! <br /> <br /> The best scenes take place after the weary college story peters out… Not like it had any real juice in the first place… Hell, even their current psychedelic overdose is lame and contrived.  So when the boys infiltrate Spring Break/Mexico there’s a neat burst of overboard sequel-action to make us forget two things: 22 isn’t as good as the first venture, and the first 3/4ths of this movie isn’t very good at all.  <br /> <br /> There are a few clever moments, however… Like a literal "red herring" reference and an obscure homage to Woody Allen’s classic ANNIE HALL… And one extreme irony when Jenko goes on a politically-correct rant over a villain’s use of a certain epithet starting with an “F”… The same thing Channing Tatum's co-star, in real life, is still (as of June 2014) desperately apologizing for!

2014, channing tatum, comedy, jonah hill, reboot, sequel, team-up

CHANNING TATUM & JONAH HILL IN 22 JUMP STREET

year: 2014 rating: ** Loaded with potential, 22 JUMP STREET is the sequel to the comedic buddy teamup (based on the 1980’s Johnny Depp T...

STEVEN SODERBERGH BIDS FAREWELL TO CINEMA W/ SIDE EFFECTS

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTtV_Qn1Fs6_6iBamihrAP3OtiYckqBAHarLGkEEK8dOpJo6XiEx5WY1XH3U2uLDbwThIF0JDVf5Bzx-kWw9ADG4PbYG_zGdRe_695F91KQ4tTzOe4QvPcGEQ53E9qTaWr-0QfpZqLb0fz/s1600/side_effects_ver2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTtV_Qn1Fs6_6iBamihrAP3OtiYckqBAHarLGkEEK8dOpJo6XiEx5WY1XH3U2uLDbwThIF0JDVf5Bzx-kWw9ADG4PbYG_zGdRe_695F91KQ4tTzOe4QvPcGEQ53E9qTaWr-0QfpZqLb0fz/s400/side_effects_ver2.jpg" width="268" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 12.8px; text-align: center;">Year Released: 2013</td></tr> </tbody></table> Move over Prozac, the ultimate depression drug is out there, and Rooney Mara’s Emily Taylor really needs it. Her husband (Channing Tatum in a filler, Janet Leigh type of "Surprisingly quick" role) just got out of jail and doesn’t seem completely done with shady deals.<br /> <br /> <div style="text-align: left;"> </div> <div style="text-align: left;"> </div> Emily crashes her car into a wall, on purpose, and recovers in a mental ward where we meet Jude Law’s Dr. Jonathan Banks, a psychologist, husband, step-father, and all around good guy. With a mellow yet attentive countenance, Dr. Jon takes a particular interest in Emily, getting info from her former shrink (Catherine Zeta-Jones), who winds up prescribing the wonder drug that might help Emily’s problems: but there are, uh, SIDE EFFECTS… Or actually just one that causes the plot to shift from an involving, smartly paced suspense film into a medical mystery that, weaving in and out of melodrama, is hit and (mostly) miss.<br /> <br /> <table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoP7mKjY9hCY7iw7r0CMdi-LqYpO6Gg0mQiJj7j9EaF_yIJc0Ah1pWXAgckYXIQgqaMd0B27xhbj0p_U2Q-ZEW30npUySD182Gnq3TrCsEwox6Jf2tc8RF8F84-l2mzFL3eKce88eeqQQ/s1600/side-effects.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="118" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoP7mKjY9hCY7iw7r0CMdi-LqYpO6Gg0mQiJj7j9EaF_yIJc0Ah1pWXAgckYXIQgqaMd0B27xhbj0p_U2Q-ZEW30npUySD182Gnq3TrCsEwox6Jf2tc8RF8F84-l2mzFL3eKce88eeqQQ/s320/side-effects.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">SideEffectScore: **1/2</td></tr> </tbody></table> Rooney Mara provides a vulnerable, porcelain doll damsel who initially deserves rescue by Jude Law, a fun actor to watch whether he's spouting dialogue or intensely listening to someone else’s. Meanwhile, last-time feature director Steven Soderbergh (supposedly quitting his day job after he could only make his Liberace biopic on cable) keeps a metronomic pace backed by a sleepy jazz score, as if the entire movie were on its own ominous medication. In this particular case, the side effect is replacing that intriguing perfect drug with a "perfect murder" plot that gets way too convoluted for its own good. And so, instead of top-shelf Soderbergh we have yet another standard Hitchcock inspired outing.

2013, channing tatum, jude law, neo noir, rooney mara, steven soderbergh, suspense

STEVEN SODERBERGH BIDS FAREWELL TO CINEMA W/ SIDE EFFECTS

Year Released: 2013 Move over Prozac, the ultimate depression drug is out there, and Rooney Mara’s Emily Taylor really needs it. Her hus...

CHANNING TATUM IN MAGIC MIKE

<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQYXcPfyeBOL2ZPlZWszbiNxsBnzRkdU4MI7Nvvq9KWyqnESqe4e1kd94NvcpqOpw4ifK5qfydIVwE48ctUP7ozMrseWvWSrmkNU6tWtWVYYVxQQGPzeQD6rS1Kt-OdUeLXzuigqlxwL5h/s1600/Look-There-are-actual-women-in-Magic-Mike-too.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="330" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQYXcPfyeBOL2ZPlZWszbiNxsBnzRkdU4MI7Nvvq9KWyqnESqe4e1kd94NvcpqOpw4ifK5qfydIVwE48ctUP7ozMrseWvWSrmkNU6tWtWVYYVxQQGPzeQD6rS1Kt-OdUeLXzuigqlxwL5h/s640/Look-There-are-actual-women-in-Magic-Mike-too.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">year: 2012 cast: Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfe, Olivia Munn, Matthew McConaughey rating: *</td></tr> </tbody></table> Secretary’s night out: The ladies fill the seats, ready for action. The movie begins, resembling a monotone pseudo documentary as we're introduced to the man of the hour: Channing Tatum’s Mike works roofing buildings and meets a younger protégé... yet he's got a secret job, and everyone but Alex Pettyfer’s naïve and quiet Adam knows what it is…<br /> <br /> Now we cut to the chase... Mike's a male stripper in an ensemble led by the energetically egotistical Matthew McConaughey as Dallas, whose over the top performance tries hard in a cast seeming part of an awkward student film. And that’s the problem.<br /> <br /> While MAGIC MIKE’s trailer promises a night in heaven for target audiences, director Steven Soderbergh is the wrong man for the job. Each scene builds with the pace of a slug, and the characters, especially newcomer Adam… going from non-dancer to professional to out of control drug addict… have little progression into a lifestyle shown in dull, uninteresting bouts of dialogue. Especially the implied love story between Mike and Adam’s sister Joanna (Olivia Munn). With a wry, bland persona, Joanna waits for Mike and Adam to come to their senses and straighten up with a worthy, less provocative gig. Problem is, that’s not what those horny secretaries in the theater paid for (she's the audience cockbocker!).<br /> <br /> The dance numbers occur fast and furious; too bizarre and over-produced to seem legitimate. And as Tatum, who based the script on his real experiences, is already planning a sequel, here’s some advice: since women need the kind of guilty pleasures men are granted in movies and TV, try making the follow-up more shallow and glossy like SHOWGIRLS and COYOTE UGLY. Those movies are bad, sure, but they deliver.

2012, channing tatum, dance, drama, matthew mcconaughey

CHANNING TATUM IN MAGIC MIKE

year: 2012 cast: Channing Tatum, Alex Pettyfe, Olivia Munn, Matthew McConaughey rating: * Secretary’s night out: The ladies fill the sea...

PUBLIC ENEMIES

<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyR2LILLhqgoDoJxNMcEf9N96GgTB8uLMNQ7Vfe1stYw_esom9VLGMTfli1z2pJwz5_CuFUDFEgEYQiGcFES6PsFnlLO3nN8hkz8DE5XTtCzgZE1rDeUrpjmYh2P7eIbqbVJ7c8vLcUt2A/s1600/public-enemies34927394.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyR2LILLhqgoDoJxNMcEf9N96GgTB8uLMNQ7Vfe1stYw_esom9VLGMTfli1z2pJwz5_CuFUDFEgEYQiGcFES6PsFnlLO3nN8hkz8DE5XTtCzgZE1rDeUrpjmYh2P7eIbqbVJ7c8vLcUt2A/s320/public-enemies34927394.jpg" width="320" /></a></div> <b>title: </b>PUBLIC ENEMIES<br /> <b>year:</b> 2009<br /> <b>cast:</b> Johnny Depp, Christian Bale<br /> <b>rating:</b> *1/2<br /> <br /> When Johnny Depp isn't overdoing he’s underplaying. The Tim Burton films has his characters flitting and frolicking on the screen like animated puppets wired on ten gallons of caffeine, while in roles like THE RUM DIARY he’s as subdued as a guy on the corner.<br /> <br /> But when playing John Dillinger, the single most famous bank robber in American history – who became (and remains) a folk hero during the depression – some of that hyperactive spark might have helped. But the failure of the overlong PUBLIC ENEMIES can’t be blamed on the immensely popular A-list celebrity. Depp, being much too pretty for the role, and whose narrow shoulders in the big black coat resembles a high school kid in a mob-themed prom, does achieve brief bouts of slowburn cool, especially when toying with the head of FBI hunter Melvin Purvis, played with monotone breeze by Christian Bale – yet another talented actor wasted in this expensive suit with no pockets.<br /> <br /> Director Michael Mann spends so much energy on the frantic action… Dillinger and his boys on the run one minute and quickly robbing banks the next… that the characters are completely wasted. There’s not one clear shot of Baby Face Nelson’s nefarious mug – he could have been a essential antagonist that would allow Dillinger to deliver more strength to the proceedings.<br /> <br /> Depp, in filling the shoes of genuine tough guys Lawrence Tierney and Warren Oates (whose turn in the 1973 John Milius biopic is still the best), gets lost in the milieu of grainy cinematography and shaky nighttime shootouts. And the sappy love story between Dillinger and his half Indian gun moll seems a mere romantic device.<br /> <br /> The biggest tragedy are the two historic keynotes to the story – Dillinger’s prison break using a gun-shaped soap bar and his eventual demise outside the movie theater thanks to the Lady in Red, are rushed along with a soundtrack more befitting a majestic biopic than a kickass one. He was a bank robber, after all, not an Emperor.

action, channing tatum, christian bale, gangster, johnny depp, michael mann, zeroes

PUBLIC ENEMIES

title: PUBLIC ENEMIES year: 2009 cast: Johnny Depp, Christian Bale rating: *1/2 When Johnny Depp isn't overdoing he’s underpla...

TATUM & HILL TAKE ON 21 JUMP STREET

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMIp7eH8WoYlZK-Yc8Y0UJkIFEaTDwVhqyCmrM9094cqe-cL0tttps3LHB6oSgpvLenYX_FjjZm9Lt1abMfrDvUt95OW7Vaav8Lc865C8Z-naA_GDCCm09FpMKg83XbINKTN78tusMUuDE/s1600/Channing-Tatum-and-Jonah-Hill-in-21-Jump-Street-2012-Movie-Image1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMIp7eH8WoYlZK-Yc8Y0UJkIFEaTDwVhqyCmrM9094cqe-cL0tttps3LHB6oSgpvLenYX_FjjZm9Lt1abMfrDvUt95OW7Vaav8Lc865C8Z-naA_GDCCm09FpMKg83XbINKTN78tusMUuDE/s320/Channing-Tatum-and-Jonah-Hill-in-21-Jump-Street-2012-Movie-Image1.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Surprisingly Cool Movie from a bad TV show</td></tr> </tbody></table> title: 21 JUMP STREET<br /> year: 2012<br /> cast: Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum<br /> rating: ***1/2 <br /> <br /> Forget the church and the address. This has little to do with the TV series about undercover cops posing as high school students – other than centering on undercover cops posing as high school students. The premise begins and ends there; the real stuff deals with the unlikely friendship between Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum: in 2005 one was a high school nerd, the other a great looking popular jock. And now it’s 2012 and things have really changed. The geeks are cool and Hill fits right in with a group of politically-correct drug dealers who are the culprits, along with a band of rugged bikers, the duo must snare. But this plot thing is secondary to our underdog heroes back in high school, aided by a clever twist involving a name screw-up: Hill takes the easy classes and Tatum, not a smart cookie, joins the chemistry club. Each discover their own clues to find the supplier of a wonder drug with vivid and hilarious side effects – that we experience first hand! And after the hijinks have played out, including a wild house party, a car chase leads to a Tarantinoeque standoff with guns blazing at the prom (with an important cameo therein). But how the unlikely duo stick together through thick and thin... both gaining a brand new perspective on their former high school experience... is what really works – making for an iconic TV series reboot that, unlike most of its kind, really hits the mark.

2012, channing tatum, comedy, jonah hill

TATUM & HILL TAKE ON 21 JUMP STREET

Surprisingly Cool Movie from a bad TV show title: 21 JUMP STREET year: 2012 cast: Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum rating: ***1/2 Forget ...

THE VOW

<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody> <tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy0AfUQ07QHJD1KZ8Ks4fUJaKmidIBD48Yh5rhXE8ekqPl9DYf3DkN0RmL_prZOBZCM27pFcuDHLhqm_LmoNTakzj_LBtPq_hcdUeql-jEddZTxZdPbtUgDTWnxOTaeqYd9KZ6D2H2B9Fr/s1600/channing-tatum-and-rachel-mcadams-the-vow-638e8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy0AfUQ07QHJD1KZ8Ks4fUJaKmidIBD48Yh5rhXE8ekqPl9DYf3DkN0RmL_prZOBZCM27pFcuDHLhqm_LmoNTakzj_LBtPq_hcdUeql-jEddZTxZdPbtUgDTWnxOTaeqYd9KZ6D2H2B9Fr/s1600/channing-tatum-and-rachel-mcadams-the-vow-638e8.jpg" /></a></td></tr> <tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Soap Opera on the Big Screen</td></tr> </tbody></table> title: THE VOW<br /> year: 2012<br /> cast: Rachel McAdams, Channing Tatum<br /> rating: **<br /> <br /> The worst thing is having to sit through the actual vow, a sappy diatribe of overwhelming Hallmark drivel during a quickie wedding ceremony, three entire times: once before Rachel McAdams, playing the perfect girl, loses her memory from a car accident; once after; and the last time right as she’s discovering that perhaps… well that’s cutting to the chase in a story that doesn’t have much of a chase at all – even though the perfect guy, Channing Tatum, having lost his wife to amnesia – the hackneyed device used in every soap opera invented – has to woe her back into his current, and her former, life. McAdams only remembers the stuff before the relationship, shown during a ten minute “flashback” of boy meeting girl and never lacking a single moment of perpetual bliss i.e. the Greatest Hits of unrealistic romance. Jessica Lange and Sam Neill, as the rich parents who don’t understand Tatum’s “lowly” lifestyle as a dreaming recording studio owner... or their daughter's choice to sculpt over law school... add as little to the storyline – which nearly tenses up once she rekindles the spark with a snarky ex fiancé. But this, like everything else, thanks to a dull script and wooden performances (especially Tatum, whose expression never changes), amounts to very little in a flick that even chicks might forget once the end credits roll.

2012, channing tatum, chick flick, rachel mcadams, romance

THE VOW

Soap Opera on the Big Screen title: THE VOW year: 2012 cast: Rachel McAdams, Channing Tatum rating: ** The worst thing is having to...